kptimes: (Anthony)
written by Anthony
happy 20th youtube!!

Its 2004, PayPal employee Jawed Karim is horny and is trying to find a video of Nipplegate, but he's disappointed when he remembers its 2004 and online video is dogshit. Then he had a world-changing idea: "what if everybody on earth had the change to watch videos of naked women?"
So he and his fellow PayPal friends (chad and steve) came got together to make a video dating website called YouTube. On Valentines Day 2005, Chad registered the trademark, logo, and domain for the website.

It took them a while to think that maybe global video connection could be useful for things other than rating how hot people are.
 
 
YouTube circa May 2005
It would take a while to make a good layout

2005
On April 23rd, 2005, Jawed uploaded the first YouTube video,
where he, in 19 seconds, notes how long elephants trunks are. Fascinating.
 
Jawed make some other videos for the website, such as "Concorde taking off", "Concorde landing", and "extreme 747 landing"


YouTube circa July 2005

After a few months, people start uploading their own videos, and thanks to embeds, YouTube got alot of traffic from MySpace, and by the end of the year, YouTube already had over 2 million views per day.



Some unimportant video by two
losers named Anthony and Ian.
Probably not a big deal.



2006
2006 was a big year for YouTube in many ways. The site had tens of millions of videos on the site, with content such as:
  • original content
  • reuploaded newgrounds movies
  • reuploaded videos from other websites
  • reuploaded tv clips
  • reuploaded movie clips
  • straight up just full movies
for some reason, copyright holders got all pissy and youtube had to make some lame changes to protect copyright or whatever
In 2006, YouTube really started to pop off, and was even featured on the actual tube 
YouTube on "Call for Help with Leo Laporte"

The site got the attention of millions of people, even Google.
And like any logical million-dollar corporation, Google bought the website, which would result in no problems whatsoever at all ever trust me.

Since Google was the most visited website on the internet, this brought even more people on to YouTube, and the site was basically known by everybody and their dead grandma by 2008.

and the rest is histuhree!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
kptimes: (Anthony)

written by Anthony



I remember it well. It was friday, january 24th, 2025.

I had arrived home, after a long, long day of work and anguish. but during my journey home, i had purchased a delicate, beautiful item worth much in my beating heart.

The very millisecond i closed the door to my home, i snapped off the cap of the bottle, and raised it to my lips. As soon as i began drinking the beautiful, black cola, i shed a tear at its amazing flavour as it flowed down my throat. and, for the first time is my long, english life, i stood up straight, with tears in my eyes, i joyfully let out "God bless America!" as i was taken away by its blissful flavour.

Till this date, i leave that very bottle of cola on my desk, and i shed blissful tears of joy whenever my eyes lay upon it.

Long live Coca-Cola.

kptimes: the icon (Default)


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(c) MMXXIII-MMXXIV Muller Brothers Comedy


kptimes: (Anthony)

written by anthony




Oldest man alive, James E. Carter, has been elected president of the United States of America after a landslide election, with 68.99% Republican votes, and 82.2% Democrat votes. Heres what people have to say about it:



“snore… hnnnnc…. snoooore…”

- Joeseph Biden on Carter


 “Y’know, I’ve always loved cantaloupe. Always have. My cantaloupeA head-and-shoulders portrait of Trump beaming in front of the U.S. flag, wearing a dark blue suit jacket with American flag lapel pin, white shirt, and light blue necktie.

are specially grown from Guam, and they’re much better than the cantaloupe of

Crooked Kamala, and far better than Sleepy Joe’s cantaloupe”

- Donald Trump on Cantaloupe after being asked about Carter



Ed Sheeran - Songs, Wife & Age”Wot’d’is bruvva say, blud? Oi, some lad best get this bloke a sipp’a tea,

i dun’no’wot’s wrong wit’ this bruvvas voicer, blud!”

- British person in a street interview on Carter before stabbing the interviewer


“D’ya know wh’yeh takin t’? I’ma cold-bludded, freed’m-luvvin, burger-eatin’,

cousin-fuckin’, a‘MURIKEN! Yeeeeeeeee hawwww!!!!!!!”

- American person in a street interview on Carter before shooting the interviewer




kptimes: (Henry)

written by Henry


The following is a historic transcript of a conversation between history’s first sexists, Grung and Urk. Carbon dating suggests this is from roughly 923,274,894,614,738 years ago.

 

grung: hey urk

urk: hey grung

grung: urk see dunk?

urk: urk do see dunk!

grung: urk see how dunk have no cave-cock?

urk: me do

grung: grung like having cave-cock™, me no like dunk not have cave-cock.

urk: urk like cave-cock™!

grung: no urk, that gay

urk: oh right, grung correct

grung: me no like dunk, dunk probably cut off cave-cock

urk: urk see many people without cave-cock

grung: that bad!!!

urk: we go kill hippopotamus now?

grung: yes

urk: people without cave-cock shouldn't hunt, they should gather instead.

grung: agree

 

This conversation would kickstart millennia of sexist standards, and this historic conversation still causes issues today.

Big news!

Apr. 1st, 2023 01:34 pm
kptimes: (Muller Comedy)
Today we have a massive announcement!
We have recently made a deal with webware manufacturing company Kaiser Pugs Inc. to sell Muller Comedy to them!
This deal will help us make more humour for you all faster and better! We already have 5 blog posts in the works, such as: "Muller Playz: Minecraft" and "UNBOXING GRAMA!? *GONE SEXUAL*"!

Don't worry, this deal will barely affect your favourite comedy site, all it will do is:
  • lower the age demographic from 14 to 9
  • remove the muller brothers from the team
  • sell the muller family to lucifer, god of hell

These are exciting changes that will only make things better here at Muller Comedy!

See you guys later!

kptimes: (Muller Comedy)

Welcome to Muller Comedy!

 

Updates will appear here soon.

 

About Muller Comedy:

Muller Comedy is a comedy website made by brothers Anthony, Quinn, and Henry Muller and has been online since March 14th, 2023.



(c) Muller Brothers Comedy, MMXXIII
kptimes: the icon (Default)
January 9th, 2025 - Mr. Government?


 January 4th, 2025 - I Wonder What My Mouth Tastes Like



January 3rd, 2025 - Computers





2024 or earlier


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